Time to be your own Valentine?

Valentines, Galentines, 50% chocolate specials whatever you associate with the season of love, its here. In amongst the new couples, chocolate binges and sobbing singles, Valentine’s Day can be something that takes its toll on so many. Whether you’re a loved up babe or a sassy single, Valentine’s Day should be a day we celebrate our longest relationship; the one we have with ourselves. In the words of Ru Paul, ‘ If you can’t love yourself, how the hell are you going to love somebody else’.

I challenge you this Valentine’s Day to celebrate yourself, the challenges you’ve face and the next steps of your life. Realising that you and you alone are solely responsible for all the things you have achieved and will continue to achieve. So grab a nice bottle of plonk, run a bath and leave the world at the door step. If a bubble bath isn’t for you, then its perfectly okay to rewrite the terms of your own valentines night.

Take time.

Okay, before i rant on about turning the world off i am. Fully aware that for many stepping away from the world on a week night probably isn’t an option. Parents, care givers and even people who have to work more than one job don’t get the option of having a night of. Yet their is one option you do have.

Taking your time- once the day is over with, is a luxury. Leaving deadlines at the doors, plodding along with your to do lists, without haste is rewarding. Having the ability to complete tasks without any rush allows you to relax and feel accomplished. Take your time isn’t always a bad thing, remember the tortoise and the hare?

Embrace who you are.

Everyone is different, therefore everyone’s way of relaxing is completely different. Listing to metal, watching the entirety of the Marvel universe and or even sitting in silence. Embracing your favourite things and running with them, is ultimately the most important thing in the season of love. If not, what’s the point? Go on, grab another chocolate and watch another episode of friends, make your soul happy.

Likewise embracing your love life is necessary to surging this sickening loved up month. Unlike, so many on social media, you don’t have to be in a relationship to have a great Valentine’s Day. Amongst the ‘Boys done good’, sea of pandora rings, and new relationships which will be lucky if they last the month, embracing your own relationship status really is important- especially in February.

I am sure at one time or another we have all be shamed for being single, or have been told that the partner we have in our lives just isn’t the one for us. Yet, in the long run, all that matters is that you are happy- the options of sheep shouldn’t rule you life. Embrace what you have even if others don’t agree.

Stop- even if its just for an evening.

As a generation, us millennial love to be busy. We love to complain about the overtime we’ve accrued or the latest amount of responsibility that we have had shoved on our desk. A friend once said, ‘I’m just too busy to take care of myself’, a sad honest truth we are all guilty of saying. Well, isn’t it time we all just stopped and cared for ourselves for just one night. Whether its deleting twitter for a night, or inviting the girls round to dance to all of Atomic Kittens Greatest hits. Taking one night away from the busy life we have, isn’t going to effect anything. Stepping away from distractions is the best way to care for yourself, and isn’t that the best way to be your own valentine?

Treat yourself.

If you are anything like me, then spending time and money on yourself seems to fall by the wayside. Work, bills, social interactions all take president to the pamper we all deserve, The term pamper is personal, for some its having a bubble bath, for others its the full shebang, face masks and all. For me, its a fresh set of gels, a new piercing and an hair cut.

Finding your own way of treating yourself, isn’t selfish. There will always be something you should be doing, or even a task that you could have finished to a higher standard. These trivial aspects of our lives ultimately stop many of us stop treating ourselves, and for what? Absolutely beggar all.

Whether you have a valentine or not this year, treat yourself how you would love them to treat you. Bubble bath, foot rub, a good bottle of wine- sounds amazing to me. Having one night away from the responsibilities which play on your mind not only allows you to rest, but allows for you to focus on the task when you pick it up again.

Remember Valentine’s Day is merely 24 hours, you have the rest of your life to find who you are, embrace it.

Happy V-Day.

Em x

Lazy Girls Guide to Confidence Boosting Skincare.

Hello, beautiful!

I’ve been debating writing a post similar to my Lazy Girls guide to Confidence Boosting Skincare, for a few months now. I’ve got such a love/hate relationship with my skin. The hidden secrets and confessions I share within this post are all products I use all the time! So I hope you enjoy! Now, let’s crack on!

Okay guys confession time, I am so lazy when it comes to skincare. Being some one who hates to sleep in make up but hates using approximately 97 products before she can hit the hay- Yeap, I am weird. Over the past few months, I have suffered severely with my skin. Mostly this is due to the combination of hormones and the artic conditions the UK has seen recently. When my skin is in bad shape, I feel terrible. Within the past month my skin has transformed and become much more nourished and dare I say it? Glowing.

The products I have shared with you are my go to products for my very lazy skincare routine. They’re all drugstore but-oh-so amazing.

Gainer Micellar Water, £4.99

Whether you’re a lazy skin care lover(like me) or a skin care aficionado, we can all agree that removing make up is skincare 101. And in my 10+ years of wiping away my poor attempts of instagram make up, I have never found anything as amazing as Garnier Micellar water. This light formula leaves my skin feeling fresh and clean ready for any other steps I fancy.

Another reason I adore this magic little potion is that it is available in most drug stores, supermarkets, airports- basically anywhere you can think of sells this god send.

Tea Tree and Witch Hazel spot stick, £4.49

A Boots own bargain!

Now as a rule I love Boots Tea Tree and Witchhazel range- but this spot stick is something else. When my hormones are at an all time high I get very painful cyst like spots (TMI, I know) which often leave me so conscious about my skin.

Applying this day and night cream to the spots doesn’t automatically change your skin but it does treat the readiness and eases the pain that comes with it. Over a week or two the spot subsides and the scaring really is left to a minimum.

Garnier, fresh-mix tissue mask, £2.99.

After Jamie Genieve raved about these amazing drugstore sheetmasks, I ran to books and bough 6.

The past few months has seen me struggle to apply make up or even just feeling comfortable on my no make up days, due to my sore dry skin. Applying the glow mask a few times a week really has helped my skin find a healthy glow that I’ve always wanted.

Unlike many, this sheet mask is so light and leaves minimal excess on my skin. And the excess product it does leave, is so easy to blend into the skin (with absolutely no effort). Garnier Fresh-Mix sheet masks have revolutionised my skin care- and I’m so happy about it.

Burts bee’s lip scrub, £6.99.

In the words of my best mate ‘Anything Burt’s Bees won’t ever let you down’ and she’s right. I have totally fallen in love with Burts Bees and don’t think I’ve been without a BB product in my hand bag for well over a year.

This honey sugar scrub is quite light and doesn’t leave any residue others do. The serum does club together but only takes a wipe and your lips are nourished and smooth. Perfect, and not messy!

Lanolips, £8.99.

Yes, I was one of the many influenced by Lydia Elise Millen to buy Lanolips. And honestly, it is bloody brilliant.

Adding Lanolips (in rhubarb), to my make up bag allows me to feel so much better even without make up. The nourishing gloss, not only helps my weather hating lips (literally every damn season) but the slight tint just finishes of my basic full face of Make up.

When I don’t use this product my lips return back into the sore dehydrated brains of my life they always are. Lanolips is my cure, for any lip issues I have, and all for £8.99!

Skincare is such a personal thing and if you’re a person who really loves to splurge on skincare then, you do you. Yet, for women such as myself I just don’t feel like an in-depth skincare routine is for me. These simple, yet effective products are things I reach for daily and couldn’t not share these affordable skin care items with you.

Hope you enjoyed!

What do you use in your skincare routine? Do you use any of the products I’ve talked about? Or do you even adore a lavish skincare routine? Please let me know in the comments.

Em x

An interview with Steph’s World

Heys guys, lil ol’ me again, but this time I am bringing you something very special.

After meeting in a pod nearly a year ago, Steph has become some one who I couldn’t live without. Our weekly updates, giggles and hufflepuff pride make my heart burst with pride. If blogging doesn’t give me anything else I’m proud to say it has helped me find not only an amazing blogger but a best mate in the process. So before I get overly emotional, it is my pleasure to introduce you to Steph’s World.

The Interview.

Hi Steph,

Hope you’re well and had a lovely Christmas. Speaking of Christmas, how did you spend it ? And what was your highlights ?

P.S. Hope Santa was nice.

Hey Em, thank you so much for letting me be part of this series which I love! Christmas was so nice, but seems so long ago now. Working full-time; it was nice just to be able to sit back and relax over the festive period. On Christmas Day, myself and my boyfriend spent the morning with my family opening gifts before heading to his sisters house for Christmas Dinner (yum yum), a few rounds of “What do you Meme” and a huge cheese board.

‘Santa treated me very well this Christmas. I am very lucky to have received lots of Charlotte Tilbury goodies, new Hunter Wellies as well as a new strap for my Fitbit and a gorgeous Barbour scarf which has been so perfect for the cold weather. ‘

Steph has been such a monumental part of my blogging experience. From moments of empowerment when I almost gave up to promoting my little space of the internet- blogging would be so much less fulfilling with out my fellow blogger.

With that being said, I couldn’t help but wonder what blogging means to Steph.

Thank you so much for being so kind. Blogging to me is all about having fun with writing. If I don’t feel like sitting down and writing a post, I just won’t do it. I feel like I want to put 100% into my posts as they will be there for me to reflect on in years to come. I already sit down and read my past travel posts or my theatre reviews to relive those memories I love. I wanted to make my blog into my own little journal and somewhere to be able to be creative.’

Arguably, Steph is one of the most creative people I have ever spoken too. She constantly amazes me by endlessly supporting others in so many innovative ways. None more so than her annual Christmas Q/A. As some who has had the pleasure of taking part for the past 2 years, I wondered if she would be continuing one of my favourite traditions.

Asking me at this time of the year is very wrong haha. I love my Christmas Blogger Q&A series so much that I have ran it now for three years. I always forget how much work and preparation I have to put into it for it to run smoothly in December. Even then I do have a few fails where I forget to publish a post (oops).

Will it be something I continue though? You heard it here first – Steph’s World will be running the Christmas Blogger Q&A in 2019!

I don’t think the run up to Christmas would be the same without it, so I will be doing them for as long as I can and people aren’t sick of it.

I have a ‘Behind the Scenes’ post on my blog if you’d like to snoop into how I run my series.

Speaking of Steph’s immense creativity, I wanted to share with you the creativity she shares throughout the other 11 months of the year. One of the most exciting things Steph has spoken about is wanting to develop her blog more.

Every year I seem to want to have a little shake-up on my blog; whether it’s refining the “Lifestyle Blogger” categories I want to cover or changing my blog theme and style.

In 2019, I would love to create more mini-series on my blog as well as another potential Guest Blogger series in the Summer. Watch this space…’

With Steph wanting to refine the ‘Lifestyle Blogger’ category, I was brought back to one of the most empowering blog post’s Steph has ever written. A few months ago Steph shared her own battle with hair loss. As a friend, I was immensely proud of the honest and empowering post she had written. I wondered if in the future she would be open to sharing more health related posts.

Thank you so much for your love and support – honestly, you made sharing my story a little easier knowing I had an amazing friend like you by my side.

Sharing my journey was so hard for me. When I started my blog, I was very much in the middle of my hair loss. I kept very anonymous on my blog with no current photos of me because I was worried about how my hair looked. One of the reasons I set up my blog was to share my story – but then it took me over another 2 years to actually share it. ‘

I knew I wanted to share my experience of hair loss as when I was going through it, I struggled to find other people’s stories and essentially I wanted to see that they came out of it the other side. Now that my hair has come back to a state I’m proud of, I knew I had to sit down and make that draft post into a published post. It was difficult, very heartbreaking to have to see how far I came through it, but it was needed. The response from fellow bloggers and even strangers on the internet who wanted to hear my story, ask further questions and ask for advice since sharing the post has made it all worth while. To me, that’s what Blogging is about.

Throughout this interview you will probably come to realise I have so much admiration for Steph, not only for the empowerment she provides others, but because she constantly astound me. To me, Steph is everyone’s blogging best mate- the exact reason she started her blog.

With that in mind i wanted to ask her what she wanted others to think when reading her blog.

‘“Omg, I would love for her to be my Best Friend”. Ok, I’m joking about that.

I just hope that people have fun and enjoy reading my posts. Whether they are informative, enjoyable to have a nosey into my life or look at some photos I’ve took, I just want people to have fun. I hope that comes across in my posts. ‘

Spoiler* she completely did…

Personal

Steph may not realise this but in the 365 days I have known her she has grown into such an amazing person. Every conversation we have leaves me proud and I can’t wait to see what 2019 holds for this amazing twenty something. No matter what happens this year there is two thing’s both Steph and I will always have, and that is our love of Harry Potter and her being a constant source of inspiration.

From donning her Hufflepuff scarf, to being genuinely one of the most supportive people on the internet I can honestly say Steph’s World is the home of Hufflepuff (well, other than Hogwarts). With that in mind, I wanted to asked who inspired her.

Hufflepuff Pride!

I’m inspired by so many people, too many to mention – one has to be the lovely Em Rambles though!

I am a massive scroller through Twitter and Instagram always on the hunt for new blogs to read. I find the community is so creative and I draw a lot of inspiration from them.

I can’t say I keep up to date with celebrities, but I do follow the like to Giovanna Fletcher, Mrs Hinch, Zoella & Carrie Hope Fletcher who keep me inspired to keep creating. ‘

I sent over these questions, just a few days into the new year but being the nosey buggar I am, I wanted to know what 2019 would hold for Steph.

*Teddy cuddles not included. (Teddy is Steps adorable family pet who i adore!)*

Totally just Teddy cuddles. He’s just like a fluffy bear!

2019 will be a year of surprises I think. I will be looking to make a bit leap into adulthood by getting on the property ladder (if all goes well). I don’t have a lot mapped out for the year, apart for being Bridesmaid for 2 weddings this year and a couple of planned theatre trips.

Here’s to finding out what 2019 has in store for me. ‘

And there you have it, an interview with one of the best people on the internet. Steph has been such a positive impact on my life, I couldn’t help but share my love and admiration for her. I can only hope that I am as good of a friend as she is.

So if you wanted to get to know this wonderful woman a little more you can find her here.

Instagram: @StephsWorld_X

Twitter: @StephsWorld_X

Blog: www.StephsWorld.com

A reintroduction to Em Rambles.

Hello you lovely bunch.

After a delve into the Rambles archive I realised that I haven’t really introduced myself or my venture into blogging. I haven’t always been Em Rambles but I have always held the same values. Initially (when Look was my bible) I was heavily focused on fashion. However right you’d be hard up to find any clothing items within my think pieces. 2018 has been a year in which my content has changed but I’ve always been the same slightly odd, emotional Em.

Education.

Let’s get the boring stuff out of the way.

I have always had a huge love of fashion, I love the confidence a garment gives a woman. Adding a beloved blazer, a killer pair of heels or even a cheeky bit of lingerie, really allows a women, to feel confident in her own skin. So once I got my GCSE’s out of the way I went straight to college to study fashion. And honestly, I was just awful. My heart was in the right place but I just didn’t have the passion for pattern cutting others in my class did. Adding to the fact I have no spacial awareness and could be classed as a hazard to society. Over time I realised it was best to back away from the scissors after completing my course.

After struggling my way through college I some how managed to get the grades I needed to go to uni. In 2014, graduated with a 2:1 from the University of Northampton. AGAIN, I found that I was probably not cut out for the demanding environment of Fashion Marketing. So after working as a temp for a few years I now work in admin, and honestly I’m pretty happy about it.

Blogging.

I will never take my time at university for granted purely because my course leader pushed me (and other in my course) to blog. Blogging has given me so much confidence and even allowed me to have something that I was able to throw myself into when my personal life was nose diving.

I now own my site and have written some blogs posts I am really proud off. Without sounding too cheesey I have no idea where my blog will take me- or even if it will take me any where at all, but it makes me feel more myself than anything else in my life. And I will forever be great full to Sally for introducing me to the blogosphere.

Nerding it out.

I LOVE all things slightly nerdy: marvel, sic-fi dramas and of course a slight bit of magic (watch this space). From comics to film franchises and to wands i love anything that is remotely classed as ‘nerdy’. I may not be academic but i can argue who was the best hobbit like a good one.

The future

In the next few months I have some amazing opportunities I can’t wait to share with you. My next major change to my blog is a move from lifestyle content to mental health. I believe that some time every one needs a helping hand, and if I the blogs I create can help anyone- then for me it’s worthwhile.

2018 has been a year that brought massive changes. As I sit and write this post I can’t wait to diversify my content and focus my blog.

Here’s to an amazing blogmas and an exciting 2019!

An Interview with Em Lemon.

Throughout the few years I have been blogging I have been lucky enough to meet some truly incredible women. From working mothers who are looking for extra income, to women with truly amazing sense of self. Blogging has not only opened doors for me personally but it has allowed friendships I hold dear to bloom.

None more so than this amazing young woman. Emma Lemon, is some one who believes in others more than she believes in herself, some one who’s creativity knows no bounds and if she believed in the term, would be the pinnacle of the term girl boss. For the past year I have been lucky to speak to this incredibly creative woman almost daily, from working with her on blog logos, to bombarding her for more information about the cutest staffy’s in the world. If blogging gives me nothing else, I am so incredibly honoured to know Emma Lemon.

Now, before I get all mushy, let me introduce you to my blogging hero.

The one and only Typegal, Emma Lemon…

With 2018 being the year Em has really grabbed life by the horns and hit the ground running. Nothing has shown this more so than her return to blogging. From her 30 thins post to her creativity with ebbs through each and every post. Em really has found her own way to do things. And I for one can’t wait for her to continue to shatter every glass ceiling which ever has the stupidity to hold her back.

Me: You’ve recently turned the big 3-0, relaunched your blog AND got your ‘dream job’ as a graphic designer. (Is there anything you can’t do?) what’s your next thing to be ticked of your 30 things list?

Em: ‘Oh yes, finally starting to get my sh*t together, bout time really isn’t it haha! Ideally I’d like it to be paying off debts, but I reckon it’ll probably be sorting out my diet. I have so many digestion issues after suffering with gallstones, and honestly it really does come down to what you put in your body! ‘

Back again… this time only better.

After a short break from Em has recently found her love and passion for writing again. When this interview was conducted a mere few days after her first blog post she filled a huge Em shaped whole in the blogosphere. I couldn’t help but wonder if she has missed blogging as avid readers (me) have missed her and her truly original pieces.

How are you feeling about your return to blogging? And do you have schedule in mind or posting when inspiration takes hold?

‘Amazing, I’m actually so happy and inspired and motivated. I’ve missed it so much, and I think this time round I’m not going to get too hung up on numbers and not being able to do what other people do. I need to realise I’m not in London, so picture perfect opportunities are not always available to me and I do actually work a full time job/have other commitments, so I can’t be on Instagram all day long. I’d like to get back into posting Wednesdays and Sundays, but I’m easing myself in and not beating myself up if I don’t manage to post on time. ‘

Ditching numbers and embracing the poorer blogging has, Em has now published a few more post, my personal favourite is ‘ Is it time to ditch the Girl Boss Term’. With uniquely refreshing content as an avid reader is so happy this incredible blogger is not only back, but back to her full potential.

Blogging hero’s.

As bloggers we always hold certain writers dear. With many providing inspiration at times when we cant find the words to fill pages. For me personally Em is one of my inspirations. When I cant find the words, the motivation or even an idea, I look to Em.

Both Em and I have often spoken about how Lydia Elise Millen has been a huge factor when it comes to out love of blogging. Her like-ability and love of Chanel are show no bounds. With so many amazing bloggers a simple google search away I asked about the other blogs which inspires Em.

Speaking of blogging, we both know Lydia Elise Millen is goals, but do you have any With 2018 being the year Em has really grabbed life by the horns and hit the ground running. Nothing has shown this more so than her return to blogging. From her 30 thins post to her creativity with ebbs through each and every post- Em really has found her own way to do things. And I for one can’t wait for her to continue to shatter every glass ceiling which ever has the stupidity to hold her back.

‘Speaking of blogging, we both know Lydia Elise Millen is goals, but do you have any other blogging hero’s who inspire you?’

‘There are so many amazing bloggers, and I find inspiration in all of them. I obviously love the big well known bloggers just as much as anyone else does, but one thing I want to try and change is the whole ‘worshipping’ thing we have going on. At the moment I’m trying to shy away from reading/following the same people I always have, and try to find people who maybe aren’t as well known but create amazing content!

That being said, I love Vix, Em Sheldon and Chloe Plumstead! ‘

Fitness friend or foe?

2018 has been a monumental year for Em, but nothing has been more amazing than her finding a love of fitness. Showing her enthusiasm of a good work out on instagram and some how still looking like a post work out goddess. I wanted to know her secret to the ‘healthy work out glow’ rather than sweaty red pancake.

Over the past few months you’ve really focused on your health and fitness, in fact, you’ve shared a lot of fitness inspo on instagram, is this something you are going to share with ink art love and your blog?

‘Well thank you for noticing! I must admit I haven’t been to them gym in at least a month (holiday and life has been too much!) I am trying to incorporate a healthier diet, that is easy to manage. I’ve been looking into things I specifically need for my body, such as fibre – I need WAY more than the average person for my insides to work properly. I absolutely love the gym now, I only do weights – purely because I want to build muscle, and I hate cardio. I’m bottom heavy so I’m just trying to shape how I want to look by using what I’ve been naturally given, so except lots of leg/booty stuff. I DO want to share workout vids/tips and recipes, from a beginners POV. ‘

Future of Emma Lemon.

Over the past few years Em been using her creative skills for all things hand lettering. A combination of her love for hand lettering and graphic design allowed her to focus on her then company Ink, Art, Love (now Typegal). From working on blog headers to displaying her stunning artistic eye on Instagram, I wanted to know what her artistic eye was going and if she had any plans to delve into homeware.

Since I’ve just mentioned your beautiful, graphics and calligraphy company, Ink Art Love, are you wanting to expand the brand, introduce new merchandise or graphics?

*cough* you should *cough*.

‘I am! I’ve used my time off over the summer to really think about what it is I want to do with it. Right now, I think I’m going to invest my time into creating beautiful paper goods. My love of creating with paper and ink is what started it all, so I’m going to go back to that! Except prints, stationery and more custom services. A MASSIVE one I want to crack with my little lettering business is to do some sign writing for somewhere like Grind in London! ONE DAY! I’m also working on a new project for bloggers, as I feel like it’s something I can contribute my knowledge too. While I want to provide services, I also want to give back to the community in any way I can, so I’m hoping to do that with blogkit.co’

Taking time to asses what she wanted her online world to be was monumental for Em, her confidence and personality seems to have shone and shown how important she is to so many. However, change didn’t stop at Em’s online world but her real life one too.

In your new 30 things post you’ve given yourself a long list of things you have already ticked off and are yet to tick off, are you excited for what’s to come? And are there any goals you are keeping to yourself?

‘I’m so excited for what’s to come. A year on from being in an AWFUL relationship, that held me back (or held me in the house so he knew where I was at all times) I’m in such a different position. I’m happier, I’m working in a job that I want, I have an amazing boyfriend who encourages me rather than bringing me down and I’m finally working on my goals! There’s only one, and that’s just to do with myself and my behaviour/wellbeing. Being mistreated over the years by men, and people who I used to call my friends has done a lot of damage that I know needs to be repaired. So every day I am actively working on that, by being kind to others and kind to myself. ‘

From a year, which most certainly deserves to stay in the past, the a bright bold future. 2018 has be a year of change for Em. As a blogger, a friend and some one who is a truly admiring reader, I am so proud of how far she’s come. *holds back drunken sobs*

With the written word being as close to Em’s heart as she is in mine I couldn’t help but wonder what quote inspired her to change her live and create the amazing adventures which are coming her way.

And lastly, (I promise not to keep you here forever) is there any quote you hold close to your heart? If so what is it?

‘There’s a quote I found ages ago on Pinterest (gotta love spending all day aimlessly scrolling through it haha) by someone called Max Lucado. I don’t know much about him, but it was on a Pinterest graphic and it has always stuck with me.

“When you are in the final days of your life, what will you want?”

Will you hug that college degree in the walnut frame? Will you ask to be carried to the garage so you can sit in your car? Will you find comfort in rereading your financial statement? Of course not. What will matter then will be people. If relationships will matter most then, shouldn’t they matter most now?”

We are always so hung up on what we have, when all that really matters is the people in your life. Bit deep, soz haha!’

For me personally Em is a constant source of hope, after being in a similar situations, she shows that there is a light at the end of every tunnel, even if at the time it feels like there’s no hope. For that reason alone I knew she had to be the first person I asked to take part in ‘An interview with…’.

Thank you so much Em. Not only for being the first of incredible women within this series but for being a constant source of help, motivation and friendship.

Always love.

Em x

Just a little disclaimer* All images used in this post are owned by Emma Lemon. She has all rights and any copyright infringement will be dealt with accordingly.

On a lighter not I am so sorry about the pixilated images this is due to the software blurring the images themselves.

A lil’ update.

If you hadn’t noticed emrambles has been severely neglected over the past three months. And honestly, I don’t have any other reason than I’ve been severely unhappy with my life.

In the past few weeks I’ve had more fall outs, tears and questions about my sanity than Jeremy Kyle has DNA tests. The level of uncertainty I have in my life has made me horrible to be around. Feeling uncertain makes me anxious, and when I’m anxious I crumble- I just can’t cope.

After a few doctors appointments( and sobs) I’ve finally got the wheels in motion to make me feel better. To concentrate on what I want in life and move closer to the stability I have always dreamed off.

You all know I love Hello October’s motivational Monday’s, a few weeks ago she shared a quote which resonated with me.

The only person going to give you the stability you crave, is you.

So from now on, that is what I intend to do.

Thank you for sticking with me! A new post will be up on Sunday!

Always love,

Em x

New ins… everything.

Hey you fit bunch, Continue reading “New ins… everything.”

Being my own security.

When I think about the last few years, I don’t think of anything other than feeling anxious. This feeling doesn’t just cover losing my grandparents, or suffering with panic attacks, it was something dealt with daily. If I’m entirely honest I don’t know what life’s like without this feeling.Feeling anxious has been with me on every life change, I have ever attempted and been there if I ever gave up, too. It’s only been recently that I’ve realised that this feeling in my chest can be used to spur me on rather than hold me back.

Anxious not anxiety.

Before I continue to write this post I just wanted to clarify this post is discussing the feeling of being ‘anxious’ not anxiety. Anxiety is a form of mental illness that we have no ability to control, it slowly takes over your life until you don’t know who you are. I can speak from personal experience that anxiety doesn’t play fair. Being ‘Anxious’, is the feeling in your tummy when you are about to do something out of your comfort zone. Once the task is over the feeling sub-dudes, with anxiety that is certainly not the case. For more information on anxiety please see the Mind website.

The original dream…

When I was a young un’, I thought my life was planned out for me. I thought I’d be happy- I had my plan, so I was good to go and start my adult life,right? If I’m honest, I held on my to my plan until I reached my early twenties, then when it became brutally apparent that my plan needed to be rethought, I struggled to let it go.

  • I’d go to uni and graduate with a first. Okay, i did go to uni and I did graduate but not with a first. I got a 2:1 through a lot of work, tears and trips to the spar for cherry coke. I look back at that time in my life and honestly, I was a complete mess. I didn’t know who I was or who I wanted to be, if I am entirely honest I don’t know if university was worth it.
  • Find my dream job in a high end fashion house. Safe to say this didn’t even remotely happen. And I’m glad, I don’t think I would be happy or ,as much as it pains me to say , fit in at a fashion house. To this day I still adore fashion, I love seeing reworked trends, pieces being influenced by great artists but would I want to work in such a demanding environment? Probably not.
  • Be married and own my own home by 25- Excuse me whilst I fall on the floor laughing.*And BREATH*.
  • Evidentially my younger self didn’t understand work, or saving or how much living costs. Scrapping this plan is so bloody nerve wracking but the changes I am making(and even already started) are very much needed.
  • Ma new plan.

  • It may not come as a surprise to some of you that the majority of this plan revolves around security. My life has always been chaotic, I’ve never really known what feeling secure at home is. Over the next few months I am so excited to finally see the changes I want to make start and hopefully in the not too distant future, actually be completed.
  • ‘The only person who is going to give you security and the life you want is you’ -Hello October (Suzie Bonaldi), Motivational Monday’s, instagram.

  • Here goes…
    • Save, save, save. Right now I’m skint, my savings have all but disappeared and honestly I’m not quite sure I’ll make it to pay day without a number of break downs. I hate this feeling of uncertainty when it comes to money. Knowing I can comfortably pay my bills if I lost my job really does mean a lot to me. So, saving is a huge must for me
      I want to own my own homealone. I doubt everything I do, so feeling secure in my own home, which I saved for and bought on my own, is a huge deal for me. Even the goal itself came as a huge realisation. I don’t want to continue to live at home relying on my parents and paying the bare minimum. It’s time for your girl to find her own way in life.
      Continue to believe in myself. Since i had a glimmer of hope (starting my new job), I have started to believe in myself. A statement I never thought possible. I’d love to push myself further and feel better about how I live from day to day. I’d love to shut the doubting voice inside my head up once and for all, but if not I’d just like to turn the volume down a little.
      Be happy. I really do just want to be happy. Obviously there will be times in everyone’s lives where being happy 24/7 isn’t possible. And that’s okay. I would love to find happiness in most days, even just for a few moments. Moments such as the first coffee in the morning, giggles with the girls or even just a snuggle from my pooch.

    What security means to me.

    Security- a thing deposited or pledged as a guarantee of the fulfilment of an undertaking or the repayment of a loan, to be forfeited in case of default.- Oxford dictionary.

    Security means completely different things to different people. Personally, security means to be able to stand on my own two feet, to work for the things I want in life and not apologise for them. To be comfortable in my own skin and to know I don’t have to be everyone’s cup of tea. Essentially, I want to be able to live my life without the feeling of anxiousness limit the things I do and want to do in the future.

    From now on.

    The next steps have kind of been prepped to within an inch of excels life. I’ve started a savings spreadsheets, budgeted for the month and really homed in on the things I need and the things I don’t. In terms of confidence, I have pushed myself to speak to new people and say yes to more experiences. Here’s, to being my own security, I can’t wait to share the next few months with you. Continue reading “Being my own security.”

    Goals for July.

    June. What can I say about you, other than you have been a bloody whirl wind. From finding a new fragrance, to getting a new job and losing all my confidence along the way, it’s safe to say this month has made me learn a thing or two.

    As I sit and write this on one of the hottest days of the year, with a glass of Savion and an empty wrapper of aero at my side- I can proudly say I have never been happier. Over the last month I have questioned every inch of my life. Checking, double checking and even sending out a few ‘am I really doing this’ text to the girls.

    Everything I questioned. Idid. What ever plays out over the coming months I can say, with a 100% certainty, that I am much stronger than i believe i am.

    (Life update coming soon, babes)

    Now let’s get to July

    July is (or at least I hope) slightly quiet compared to June. No birthdays, lunches out or new jobs – well, I hope not. Yes, this may have something to do with the fact I absolutely broke until the end of the month, or that I barely have a social life, but to be honest I’m excited for a break.

    No1. Take some time for me.

    Now, I’m not talking about taking one Sunday afternoon to read my book. I really want to take some time to figure out what I want and where I’m going. The past month has left me a pretty exhausted to be honest.

    Recently, I’ve been using meditation a few times a week to really home in on what I want in life and I’m so excited figure out ways to get my big life goals in motion.. although, my friends that’s for another time.

    Yoga, reading, facial? I’m not sure what’s going to happen but I’m really looking to finding something.

    No 2. Drink less.

    Don’t get me wrong I do like a tipple every now and again, but with the great British heat wave, I’ve been even more partial to a glass of white! So a major goal for me is to cut down on my drinking. ,

    Maybe just one night a week? Send rain, maybe?

    No 3. Find out what a bloody ISA is.

    Next on my adult to do list is …….. *drum rollll* savings. How adult of me. Any way, I’ve been debating putting some money away for a rainy day for a few months but recently I’ve had a lot of bills being paid off and wine to buy.

    ISA’s are a bit of a challenge for me. I’m just not sure what they are or even if it would work for me. So finding out the ins and out is pretty much a must for me.

    No 4. Get back in my diet.

    Yeah, I’m another girl on a diet. I haven’t lost a lot of weight over the last few months but I lost a little bit and it really made me feel much more confident within my body. So starting my healthier life style again is kind of needed.

    Right now my confidence is creeping back up and introducing a healthier life style again can only help.

    There you go my loves, my July goals. June’s been amazing- I can’t wait to tell you how July goes!

    Always love,

    Em x

    Accepting Flaws and Moving on…

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    Over the past few months I have stripped back my life, friendships and even goals have been totally turned around. Doing this I have found myself not only feeling better about myself but I have finally found my feet. As cliché as it sounds, I finally know that I am where I am, because I have earned the right to be here.

    Even though I know where I am and the direction I want to go in, I feel cant help but feel like I could so easily revert. Finding yourself at a crossroads in your life is confusing, you could so easily make the wrong decision and find yourself back at square one. Feeling like a failure comes far to easy for myself, but I’d rather fail than never know.

    Accepting that sometimes you’re your own worst enemy.

    I’ve spoken in the past about pressure and the negative effect it has on our lives. Yet, knowing this and accepting this strange concept is two exceptionally different things. Knowing you constantly berate yourself over the tiniest insignificant details of your life is something, if we are all honest with ourselves, we are aware of but won’t change. In a world where ‘change’ is needed, why on earth is it so hard to except the things we know need to change to benefit our lives?

    Its simple, we are pretending.

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    We’re pretending that even if we accepted everything we needed to move on our lives would be exactly the same. BUT, they wouldn’t. The thought of change is scary- its scares me to my very core to be honest. Change isn’t derogatory, its necessary. Do you really want to be the same person as that teenager that thought concealer lips and dream matte mouse was a ‘banging combination’. No, of course you don’t.

    Being you’re own worst enemy is soul destroying, it changes your mind set, your world and your ability to live the life you only dream off. And that’s starts with you, accepting that being uneccaserily hard on yourself will not win wars, it won’t make your day dreams come true- it will prevent them.

    You are worth so much more than that bewildered feeling, you carry with you. Stop it, leave it move on.

    Realising you’re worth much more than you were settling for.

    Believe it or not this point is not about relationships. Its about settling in your life. Shitty jobs, poor self esteem, down right awful health- we don’t need to accept this. You are settling. We often dream of having a better life, but never seem to put ourselves forward and actually start the process of bettering it.

    Settling, is damaging. Once you start to settle for something, your self esteem goes so far down the toilet its swimming in the Pacific. You are so much more than what you are accepting, if we only get one chance why the hell are we rolling over and settling in life.

    Learning to laugh at yourself.

    We all f*ck up. There is no rhyme or reason. We all have clumsy tendencies, I know I for one am fully aware that if there is a glass door in my presence, I will not only walk into it but leave my foundation print on it so I can never be forgotten.

    Laughing(even fake laughter) creates endorphins which will intern make you happier. Faking a laugh at a cliché colleague or even letting a slight giggle out over a drunken text to an ex, will help you. And if we are being honest, if you take the shame away, drunk texting actually pretty funny- in the morning when sober, at least.

    Life shouldn’t be taken too seriously, even the most resting of bitch faces could do with cracking sometimes. Laughing is good for the soul, taking yourself too seriously creates unnecessary pressure. And seriously, who needs more of that?

    Moving on.

    Moving on in life is difficult. A task that is simply more daunting than we could ever imagine, its essentially like were breaking up with the negative effects in our lives. Is it time to block your insecurities,  to throw out all the negative impacts off your life or even just to tell the world to fuck off when you’re hammered. Its all perfectly fine.IMG_4365 (1)

    When you pick up broken the pieces in life, they never seem to fit together. Because they don’t. You are not the same – you’ve learnt and are starting to live differently. And huns, sometimes you do revert but the funny thing is, you can stop and start again. No one worth their salt will judge you and if they do, quite frankly, they are nothing.

    Its so easy to focus on the shit end of the scale when it comes to life, but when was the last time you actively sort to change something? Yes, change is most definitely a scary prospect, and you will constantly wonder if you should have started in the first place.

    Simply, YES. You never know unless you step away from the things that are holding you back. Whether that be relationships, work, insecurities or even social media. Whatever it is, it is more than okay to step away for a little while. Even a few days away to collect your thoughts will create time to change your view on things. Never, let the pressure make you feel worthless, because you are not. You’re a boss.

     

    ALWAYS, love.

    Em x