December goals and festive woes.

DECEMBER, its bloody, December- it doesn’t seem two minutes since we were going through the longest January in history. Simply put i have no idea where this year has gone but so excited to see the back of it.

Colder months are my happy months, seeing the red cups dressing the high streets, mulled wine filling the bellies of many and judgmental family members who we only see at Christmas dinner knocking at the door. Christmas is a time for celebrating. And that’s exactly what these goals represent. Celebration.

1. Spend time with family.

I don’t have a lot of family, in fact I can count on my hand the amount of people who I class as family. So spending time with them at Christmas is a must – even if we end up bickering our way through the day. Remember: Time spent together is time well spent.

2.Get out of the house.

I spend so much time indoors that sometimes the thought of life outside an office feels alien. Getting up and out of the house may just help me christmas cabin fever and allow me to finally relax and enjoy my time off work and blogging.

3. Have christmas off.

Last year I worked day in day out on my blog for practically no avail. This year with the help of organising, I intend on actually having time away from my keyboard.

4. Stop thinking about everyone else and enjoy christmas.

I worry so much about what everyone else thinks. This christmas its time for a change. I want to laugh, drink and eat this festive season. Christmas 2018 is going time for laughter and relaxation.

I may not celebrate Christmas in the conventional sense. I’m much more likely to wresling with a bottle of wine rather than playing manopoly or watching childrens renditions of silent night. Yet, this christmas is one for me and me only- its time to enjoy life and if all else fails, learn a new cocktail or two.

Thank you for reading my little goals for the month of December. Let me know your goals for the festive season in the comments below.

Always love,

Em x

An Interview with Em Lemon.

Throughout the few years I have been blogging I have been lucky enough to meet some truly incredible women. From working mothers who are looking for extra income, to women with truly amazing sense of self. Blogging has not only opened doors for me personally but it has allowed friendships I hold dear to bloom.

None more so than this amazing young woman. Emma Lemon, is some one who believes in others more than she believes in herself, some one who’s creativity knows no bounds and if she believed in the term, would be the pinnacle of the term girl boss. For the past year I have been lucky to speak to this incredibly creative woman almost daily, from working with her on blog logos, to bombarding her for more information about the cutest staffy’s in the world. If blogging gives me nothing else, I am so incredibly honoured to know Emma Lemon.

Now, before I get all mushy, let me introduce you to my blogging hero.

The one and only Typegal, Emma Lemon…

With 2018 being the year Em has really grabbed life by the horns and hit the ground running. Nothing has shown this more so than her return to blogging. From her 30 thins post to her creativity with ebbs through each and every post. Em really has found her own way to do things. And I for one can’t wait for her to continue to shatter every glass ceiling which ever has the stupidity to hold her back.

Me: You’ve recently turned the big 3-0, relaunched your blog AND got your ‘dream job’ as a graphic designer. (Is there anything you can’t do?) what’s your next thing to be ticked of your 30 things list?

Em: ‘Oh yes, finally starting to get my sh*t together, bout time really isn’t it haha! Ideally I’d like it to be paying off debts, but I reckon it’ll probably be sorting out my diet. I have so many digestion issues after suffering with gallstones, and honestly it really does come down to what you put in your body! ‘

Back again… this time only better.

After a short break from Em has recently found her love and passion for writing again. When this interview was conducted a mere few days after her first blog post she filled a huge Em shaped whole in the blogosphere. I couldn’t help but wonder if she has missed blogging as avid readers (me) have missed her and her truly original pieces.

How are you feeling about your return to blogging? And do you have schedule in mind or posting when inspiration takes hold?

‘Amazing, I’m actually so happy and inspired and motivated. I’ve missed it so much, and I think this time round I’m not going to get too hung up on numbers and not being able to do what other people do. I need to realise I’m not in London, so picture perfect opportunities are not always available to me and I do actually work a full time job/have other commitments, so I can’t be on Instagram all day long. I’d like to get back into posting Wednesdays and Sundays, but I’m easing myself in and not beating myself up if I don’t manage to post on time. ‘

Ditching numbers and embracing the poorer blogging has, Em has now published a few more post, my personal favourite is ‘ Is it time to ditch the Girl Boss Term’. With uniquely refreshing content as an avid reader is so happy this incredible blogger is not only back, but back to her full potential.

Blogging hero’s.

As bloggers we always hold certain writers dear. With many providing inspiration at times when we cant find the words to fill pages. For me personally Em is one of my inspirations. When I cant find the words, the motivation or even an idea, I look to Em.

Both Em and I have often spoken about how Lydia Elise Millen has been a huge factor when it comes to out love of blogging. Her like-ability and love of Chanel are show no bounds. With so many amazing bloggers a simple google search away I asked about the other blogs which inspires Em.

Speaking of blogging, we both know Lydia Elise Millen is goals, but do you have any With 2018 being the year Em has really grabbed life by the horns and hit the ground running. Nothing has shown this more so than her return to blogging. From her 30 thins post to her creativity with ebbs through each and every post- Em really has found her own way to do things. And I for one can’t wait for her to continue to shatter every glass ceiling which ever has the stupidity to hold her back.

‘Speaking of blogging, we both know Lydia Elise Millen is goals, but do you have any other blogging hero’s who inspire you?’

‘There are so many amazing bloggers, and I find inspiration in all of them. I obviously love the big well known bloggers just as much as anyone else does, but one thing I want to try and change is the whole ‘worshipping’ thing we have going on. At the moment I’m trying to shy away from reading/following the same people I always have, and try to find people who maybe aren’t as well known but create amazing content!

That being said, I love Vix, Em Sheldon and Chloe Plumstead! ‘

Fitness friend or foe?

2018 has been a monumental year for Em, but nothing has been more amazing than her finding a love of fitness. Showing her enthusiasm of a good work out on instagram and some how still looking like a post work out goddess. I wanted to know her secret to the ‘healthy work out glow’ rather than sweaty red pancake.

Over the past few months you’ve really focused on your health and fitness, in fact, you’ve shared a lot of fitness inspo on instagram, is this something you are going to share with ink art love and your blog?

‘Well thank you for noticing! I must admit I haven’t been to them gym in at least a month (holiday and life has been too much!) I am trying to incorporate a healthier diet, that is easy to manage. I’ve been looking into things I specifically need for my body, such as fibre – I need WAY more than the average person for my insides to work properly. I absolutely love the gym now, I only do weights – purely because I want to build muscle, and I hate cardio. I’m bottom heavy so I’m just trying to shape how I want to look by using what I’ve been naturally given, so except lots of leg/booty stuff. I DO want to share workout vids/tips and recipes, from a beginners POV. ‘

Future of Emma Lemon.

Over the past few years Em been using her creative skills for all things hand lettering. A combination of her love for hand lettering and graphic design allowed her to focus on her then company Ink, Art, Love (now Typegal). From working on blog headers to displaying her stunning artistic eye on Instagram, I wanted to know what her artistic eye was going and if she had any plans to delve into homeware.

Since I’ve just mentioned your beautiful, graphics and calligraphy company, Ink Art Love, are you wanting to expand the brand, introduce new merchandise or graphics?

*cough* you should *cough*.

‘I am! I’ve used my time off over the summer to really think about what it is I want to do with it. Right now, I think I’m going to invest my time into creating beautiful paper goods. My love of creating with paper and ink is what started it all, so I’m going to go back to that! Except prints, stationery and more custom services. A MASSIVE one I want to crack with my little lettering business is to do some sign writing for somewhere like Grind in London! ONE DAY! I’m also working on a new project for bloggers, as I feel like it’s something I can contribute my knowledge too. While I want to provide services, I also want to give back to the community in any way I can, so I’m hoping to do that with blogkit.co’

Taking time to asses what she wanted her online world to be was monumental for Em, her confidence and personality seems to have shone and shown how important she is to so many. However, change didn’t stop at Em’s online world but her real life one too.

In your new 30 things post you’ve given yourself a long list of things you have already ticked off and are yet to tick off, are you excited for what’s to come? And are there any goals you are keeping to yourself?

‘I’m so excited for what’s to come. A year on from being in an AWFUL relationship, that held me back (or held me in the house so he knew where I was at all times) I’m in such a different position. I’m happier, I’m working in a job that I want, I have an amazing boyfriend who encourages me rather than bringing me down and I’m finally working on my goals! There’s only one, and that’s just to do with myself and my behaviour/wellbeing. Being mistreated over the years by men, and people who I used to call my friends has done a lot of damage that I know needs to be repaired. So every day I am actively working on that, by being kind to others and kind to myself. ‘

From a year, which most certainly deserves to stay in the past, the a bright bold future. 2018 has be a year of change for Em. As a blogger, a friend and some one who is a truly admiring reader, I am so proud of how far she’s come. *holds back drunken sobs*

With the written word being as close to Em’s heart as she is in mine I couldn’t help but wonder what quote inspired her to change her live and create the amazing adventures which are coming her way.

And lastly, (I promise not to keep you here forever) is there any quote you hold close to your heart? If so what is it?

‘There’s a quote I found ages ago on Pinterest (gotta love spending all day aimlessly scrolling through it haha) by someone called Max Lucado. I don’t know much about him, but it was on a Pinterest graphic and it has always stuck with me.

“When you are in the final days of your life, what will you want?”

Will you hug that college degree in the walnut frame? Will you ask to be carried to the garage so you can sit in your car? Will you find comfort in rereading your financial statement? Of course not. What will matter then will be people. If relationships will matter most then, shouldn’t they matter most now?”

We are always so hung up on what we have, when all that really matters is the people in your life. Bit deep, soz haha!’

For me personally Em is a constant source of hope, after being in a similar situations, she shows that there is a light at the end of every tunnel, even if at the time it feels like there’s no hope. For that reason alone I knew she had to be the first person I asked to take part in ‘An interview with…’.

Thank you so much Em. Not only for being the first of incredible women within this series but for being a constant source of help, motivation and friendship.

Always love.

Em x

Just a little disclaimer* All images used in this post are owned by Emma Lemon. She has all rights and any copyright infringement will be dealt with accordingly.

On a lighter not I am so sorry about the pixilated images this is due to the software blurring the images themselves.

Blogmas, my way.

Merry Christmas!

It’s December and that means only one thing! Blogmas or at least my own version of Blogmas. This year I wanted to write my own version of Blogmas, one that gives you lovely readers enough content but also allows me to not work constantly for the next 31 days.

I love Christmas and would love to enjoy both the festive season and blogging. Blogmas puts so much pressure on those of us who love the festive season. As some one who’s blogged for years I feel like I can safely say by the end of Blogmas most bloggers never want to hear the word Blogmas for at least another 11 months.

SO, in the hopes of saving my own sanity I have wrote myself a set of rules which will hopefully allow me to contribute to Blogmas in my own way.

1, Content doesn’t have to be festive.

Throughout the next month some of my content isn’t festive, infact its so removed from Christmas its unreal- and that’s perfectly okay. Christmas puts pressure on everyone and sometimes us mere mortals need to have a minute without a mince pie or festive joy.

The festive season is a difficult one, so having a break from festivities is a must for not only me but for others too.

2, Monday to Friday, only.

Over the past few years I have realised that I am in no way organised to contribute daily to Blogmas. As much as I adore writing I simply run out of inspiration come December 27th. Most poeple read content at weekend so uploading 7 post in a week can be excessive and some readers may miss a great post you’ve worked your arse off on.

Choosing to limit my Blogmas content came with a very heavy heart, if I’m totally honest I feel like I have let my self down a little, but for the sake of my mental health I have come to realise working full time and blogging daily is just too much for me right now.

3, ITS MY BLOGMAS.

As a rule blogmas runs form the 1st December to the 31st – that is a lot of content. I applaud any one who attempts to do this but for me personally, I don’t think its a viable option. With that being said, this is my blogmas, on my blog so i felt that it was about time i rewrote the rules.

I hope you understand and are ready for a few exciting introductions (including my monthly bar review to name one). Are you ready?

I don’t think I am,

Continue reading “Blogmas, my way.”

September.

Hello my loves,

If you haven’t guessed from the title, I am sharing with you all the things I’ve been up to over the month of September. As I sit and write this on the 23rd September (yes the day i published this post- I’m an organised little bean) I know that September needed to happen.

Throughout, this post I am sharing a lot of personal experiences, I never want to offend anyone else, but these are my experiences and I really think sharing them is important to not only ,self but to others which may be going through something similar.

Leeds.

Rather than start this post negatively, I want to share with you one of the best weekends I have had in a very long time. By nature I’m not a social creature: I love spending time in my own company. Yet, since starting my new job I have been trying my best to spend more time with friends.

On the first of September a gal pal and I went to one of my favourite cities in the world, Leeds. Staying the night at Park Plaza, we laughed, drank and (she) shopped. This weekend was filled full of all my favourite things and has even inspired a few blog posts which will hopefully be coming in the not too distant future.

I really have cherished this weekend because it truly did make me so happy. And quite honestly I don’t think I’ve laughed like that in a very long time!

The Ex.

*Internally sighs.*

Over the past few weeks I’ve started becoming a little more open to dating again. Maybe it’s because of the influx of couples surrounding me or maybe it’s just because I’m ready to bring someone new into my life. Whatever the reason, the past few weeks have been slightly eye opening.

I’ve openly discussed my passed relationships on this blog, so I feel like it’s only appropriate for me to share with you that I let me ex back into my life. After a few weeks of speaking old feelings started to rise to the surface and I was left questioning who I was again. There is no doubt in my mind that I loved the person who left me heart broken, but I know that we simply couldn’t work. My ex wanted something a lot more casual than I ever did.

Ultimately I ended up in tears asking said ex to delete my number and not contact me again. After a good cry and a couple of glasses of wine I soon realised that I didn’t need him. I love the idea of having a boyfriend, this was simply the final thing I needed to say goodbye to that relationship.

Sorry I know I shared this n my previous post but just feel so happy about this picture

Fuck it. I am enough.

Haven’t dropped the F bomb in a while have I?

Nevertheless, September was the month I realised that no matter how long the friendship, the relationship or experience, I am enough for me- and right now that’s all that matters. For years, I’ve constantly struggled with not feeling like I’m enough for people. Both in a relationships and general day to day life, I have never felt good enough in any situation that I’ve been through.

A lot of my insecurities are based on not being enough.

  • I’m not pretty enough.
  • I’m not thin enough.
  • Im not competent enough.

The list really is endless and exhausting.

In that very moment I asked the man I was once head over heels in love with to forget I ever existed, I realised I was enough. In that single moment, I showed myself more self love than I have ever done before. Dealing with endless questions , personal judgements and quite frankly brutal thoughts about myself, made me such a sad individual. Right now, i refuse to feel inferior to any one.

And it has continued.

Of course, I am going to be insecure about certain aspects of my life but on those days, I will always find comfort in the knowledge that I’ve lived through every ‘bad day’. Essentially in a strange round about way, I can finally say that I may not be happy with every aspect of my life but right now, I am finally happy with the person I am and the way my life is going.

If you’ve managed to get through this posts without having a nap in between then snaps to you! Thank you for sticking with me, I can’t wait to share with you how the next 31 days go.

Always love,

Em x

A lil’ update.

If you hadn’t noticed emrambles has been severely neglected over the past three months. And honestly, I don’t have any other reason than I’ve been severely unhappy with my life.

In the past few weeks I’ve had more fall outs, tears and questions about my sanity than Jeremy Kyle has DNA tests. The level of uncertainty I have in my life has made me horrible to be around. Feeling uncertain makes me anxious, and when I’m anxious I crumble- I just can’t cope.

After a few doctors appointments( and sobs) I’ve finally got the wheels in motion to make me feel better. To concentrate on what I want in life and move closer to the stability I have always dreamed off.

You all know I love Hello October’s motivational Monday’s, a few weeks ago she shared a quote which resonated with me.

The only person going to give you the stability you crave, is you.

So from now on, that is what I intend to do.

Thank you for sticking with me! A new post will be up on Sunday!

Always love,

Em x

Being ‘Mediocre’ Me.

Over the past few years I’ve realised I am ridiculously mediocre. I’m no Victoria secret model, I’m no brain surgeon and to be honest, I’m just not that interesting.

Whilst friends have gone traveling, dropped a lot of weight, had families – or just generally been amazing. I’ve skated by never really stepping out of my comfort zone.

Achieving the unobtainable?

Mediocre – of only average quality; not very good.

Google, 2018

Being mediocre is arguably, a personal judgement. For me I will always say I could work harder to create opportunities to start the career I dream off- rather than eat chocolate, drink wine and binge on a new Netflix series.

I will always feel as if I’m mediocre, because my goals were so unachievable. Goals should be something to work towards rather than to create boundaries. Positivity, or what ever you want to call it, should run through you whenever you tip toe towards any goal. For me, personally, it just wasn’t the case. Goals became a way I restricted my happiness- so I completely scrapped them. And right now, I have no idea what I want.

Yes, I still want to own my own home(one of my major life goals), but what would be the point in finding more freedom if I was just restricting myself from amazing opportunities, which could come my way?

Its not about effort.

As much as I say I have skated by, I can say that I’ve worked bloody hard to achieve the little I have. For years I never thought much about myself- or at least nothing positive. So when it comes to completing a task, and doing it to the best of my ability, I was left completely deflated. No matter the amount of hours I’ve put in, the effort, the tears- I’ve never felt like it was enough. For me, my own expectations were my biggest enemy. I am my own worst enemy.

Take my blog for example, I adore it. In fact I have about 12 blog posts almost ready to go. Yet, the thing that holds be back isn’t the effort behind the writing but the belief that there even worth reading.

Right now?

I have no idea where the hell my life is going. And I’m not mad about it.

Over the past 10 years I’ve always had a plan. Set goals and deadlines that were realistically never going to happen. As long as my life is moving forward, I’m happy and healthy- I could not give a sh*t.

Of course, my life hasn’t be a bed of roses, and I am simply not naive enough to think it will be. I do know one thing. Whatever the future holds, there will be a lot of wine, a lot of laughs and most certainly a few more blog posts.

Always love.

Em x

What blogging means to me.

Blogging, right now, is completely the love of my life. I love spilling out my ideas into words, even if noone reads them. My little blog, is just that. Mine.

Over the past year I have grown a little in confidence. Blogging has completely attributed to that. After finally being able to home in on the content that I want to create, I finally was able to start accepting my flaws and laugh the embarrassment of yet another fuck up away.

Truth be told I probably have an unhealthy attachment to the blogosphere. From dispising trolls and championing bloggers when they succeed. Blogging brought me out of my shell and allowed me to figure out ,somewhat ,who I wanted to be.

I will be forever grateful for that.

Having a voice.

For years I never felt my opinion mattered; I didn’t think I did. Being able to express that on my blog, to find others felt the same shocked me to my core.

The more I wrote, the more I found my opinion mattered. For months I didn’t understand that people were actively responding to the words I was using. I found a voice, that people didn’t seem to hate. And in time I started to listen to my own views more and more.

Bad dates, lack of confidence, my hatred of the way I look- I have pretty much shared my insecurities with every reader. The more I wrote the more I accepted the things that had happened to me, the shit I’ve done and laugh at the down right questionable experiences.

I found that I may just be somewhat relatable to others. And sharing my weird experiences, views and innuendos, might just make others feel less of a fuck up.

Relatable vs Luxury ?

With so many bloggers in the bloggersphere, everyone has blogs which relate to them. For me, personally, blogging is relatable. Even inspiring luxury blogs still home some sort of relatable aspects for most. Take Lydia Elise Millen, for example. Sure, she buys handbags I can only dream off, travels to places I may never see in my life time, but she is relatable. Her openness about mental health, feeling inadequate in not only her life but in the blogosphere and of course, her love of Zoflora.

No matter the genre, blogging is relatable to almost every person alive.

There’s so many bloggers.

According to Aquora.com, that in 2013 there was 152 million bloggers in the world. A figure which has grown rapidly since.

I have to admit even I was shocked at that figure- although not surprised. Of course there are a heck of a lot of bloggers out there, but that isn’t a bad thing. There is so much choice out there for readers. Genuine content, amazingly beautiful images and likeable bloggers thrive in the blogosphere.

The amount of bloggers for me personally, shown the amount of people that needed some where to find their voice. To share their loves, excitement and hopes for the future. As cheesey at the cheese counter at Sainsbury’s, blogging has allowed so many creators to find a voice, confidence and friends- it makes my heart burst with pride.

And me?

I love being relatable. Blogging for me has been something that I can be 100% honest with. The embarrassment of walking into doors, honesty about my life and even really dodgy fake tans- I hope my take makes others feel better about their misgivings.

Blogging is relatable to the reader- it’s that simple. A blog post may not be relevant to you at that time, but in six months, a year or even 5, it just may be.

Right now, I talk a lot about my point of view in life. And honestly that isn’t going to change. For me, product reviews can be saved for bloggers such as Debra Bow, travel for I’m just a girl and luxury Lydia Millen.

Being laugh out loud, relatable is me. And my blog should represent that. In such a (hate the word vomit I’m going to spill) saturated industry, you are you’re own selling point and if others don’t like it, then there’s plenty of other people that will.

Blogging is amazing. It’s that simple. I don’t intend in dropping it from my life or changing the content I create.

I am so happy I found blogging. It allows me to share my dorky stories, embrace the chaos and champion the new chapters in my life. Thank you for the people who continue to support me

Always love,

Em x

Being my own security.

When I think about the last few years, I don’t think of anything other than feeling anxious. This feeling doesn’t just cover losing my grandparents, or suffering with panic attacks, it was something dealt with daily. If I’m entirely honest I don’t know what life’s like without this feeling.Feeling anxious has been with me on every life change, I have ever attempted and been there if I ever gave up, too. It’s only been recently that I’ve realised that this feeling in my chest can be used to spur me on rather than hold me back.

Anxious not anxiety.

Before I continue to write this post I just wanted to clarify this post is discussing the feeling of being ‘anxious’ not anxiety. Anxiety is a form of mental illness that we have no ability to control, it slowly takes over your life until you don’t know who you are. I can speak from personal experience that anxiety doesn’t play fair. Being ‘Anxious’, is the feeling in your tummy when you are about to do something out of your comfort zone. Once the task is over the feeling sub-dudes, with anxiety that is certainly not the case. For more information on anxiety please see the Mind website.

The original dream…

When I was a young un’, I thought my life was planned out for me. I thought I’d be happy- I had my plan, so I was good to go and start my adult life,right? If I’m honest, I held on my to my plan until I reached my early twenties, then when it became brutally apparent that my plan needed to be rethought, I struggled to let it go.

  • I’d go to uni and graduate with a first. Okay, i did go to uni and I did graduate but not with a first. I got a 2:1 through a lot of work, tears and trips to the spar for cherry coke. I look back at that time in my life and honestly, I was a complete mess. I didn’t know who I was or who I wanted to be, if I am entirely honest I don’t know if university was worth it.
  • Find my dream job in a high end fashion house. Safe to say this didn’t even remotely happen. And I’m glad, I don’t think I would be happy or ,as much as it pains me to say , fit in at a fashion house. To this day I still adore fashion, I love seeing reworked trends, pieces being influenced by great artists but would I want to work in such a demanding environment? Probably not.
  • Be married and own my own home by 25- Excuse me whilst I fall on the floor laughing.*And BREATH*.
  • Evidentially my younger self didn’t understand work, or saving or how much living costs. Scrapping this plan is so bloody nerve wracking but the changes I am making(and even already started) are very much needed.
  • Ma new plan.

  • It may not come as a surprise to some of you that the majority of this plan revolves around security. My life has always been chaotic, I’ve never really known what feeling secure at home is. Over the next few months I am so excited to finally see the changes I want to make start and hopefully in the not too distant future, actually be completed.
  • ‘The only person who is going to give you security and the life you want is you’ -Hello October (Suzie Bonaldi), Motivational Monday’s, instagram.

  • Here goes…
    • Save, save, save. Right now I’m skint, my savings have all but disappeared and honestly I’m not quite sure I’ll make it to pay day without a number of break downs. I hate this feeling of uncertainty when it comes to money. Knowing I can comfortably pay my bills if I lost my job really does mean a lot to me. So, saving is a huge must for me
      I want to own my own homealone. I doubt everything I do, so feeling secure in my own home, which I saved for and bought on my own, is a huge deal for me. Even the goal itself came as a huge realisation. I don’t want to continue to live at home relying on my parents and paying the bare minimum. It’s time for your girl to find her own way in life.
      Continue to believe in myself. Since i had a glimmer of hope (starting my new job), I have started to believe in myself. A statement I never thought possible. I’d love to push myself further and feel better about how I live from day to day. I’d love to shut the doubting voice inside my head up once and for all, but if not I’d just like to turn the volume down a little.
      Be happy. I really do just want to be happy. Obviously there will be times in everyone’s lives where being happy 24/7 isn’t possible. And that’s okay. I would love to find happiness in most days, even just for a few moments. Moments such as the first coffee in the morning, giggles with the girls or even just a snuggle from my pooch.

    What security means to me.

    Security- a thing deposited or pledged as a guarantee of the fulfilment of an undertaking or the repayment of a loan, to be forfeited in case of default.- Oxford dictionary.

    Security means completely different things to different people. Personally, security means to be able to stand on my own two feet, to work for the things I want in life and not apologise for them. To be comfortable in my own skin and to know I don’t have to be everyone’s cup of tea. Essentially, I want to be able to live my life without the feeling of anxiousness limit the things I do and want to do in the future.

    From now on.

    The next steps have kind of been prepped to within an inch of excels life. I’ve started a savings spreadsheets, budgeted for the month and really homed in on the things I need and the things I don’t. In terms of confidence, I have pushed myself to speak to new people and say yes to more experiences. Here’s, to being my own security, I can’t wait to share the next few months with you. Continue reading “Being my own security.”

    Slut Shamers: Back off.

    After falling completely head over heels for the love island hype, I’ve recently been wondering about slut shaming. Personally I can’t quite believe that in this day and age the term slut is still used at all. Women are empowered, beautiful and successful, but when it comes to sex are we still meant to blush at the word orgasm?Millennial women are constantly told not to settle, to strive for the world and never apologise for it. Yet when it comes to sex are we meant to sit and wait man or woman of our dreams to come barrelling through the bed room door?

    Are we meant to settle?

    It has been statistically proven that having an active sex life relieves stress and can even extend your life. And I think most of us can agree that great sex is most definitely a stress reliever.With women striving for great careers, dream homes, travelling the world. Why are we expected to settle for a poor sex life? Both men and women judge, it’s one of the down sides to being human. Neither sex is golden when it comes to judgement. And that is exactly what slut shaming is, judgment. And I’m not for it.

    It’s a numbers game.

    10, 20, 0? Does it really matter what happens in our own rooms as long as it’s consensual? We’ve all at one time or another been made to feel shit about our sex life, lack of or even fruitful. It’s quite shameful that both men and women play the slut shaming game. If women were to wait for their dream partner to get off fifa, stop scratching their knackers and finally attempt to figure out the female anatomy, then we may be waiting a heck of a long time.

    But men have needs.

    Hate to knock you off that pedestal you’re on, but so do women. In fact a woman’s clitorius is 12 inches long. Which I think most people can agree can put men to shame. Sorry not sorry.

    I’m not shaming men

    This post is not me shaming men, in fact it’s not even meant to shame women but over the past few weeks I have seen so many tweets, comments and everything in the middle discussing women’s sex lives. Many of which fit into the slut shaming bubble. Didn’t your mum tell you, if you didn’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all?

    It’s no ones right to sex.

    Believe it or not, one gender doesn’t have the right to sex over the other. Gone are the days (or AT least they should be) where there is judgement when it comes to sex and the number of sexual partners you have.

    Slut shaming needs to be a thing of the past. The negative implications of shaming others for enjoying themselves can stick with someone for life. Think about what you’re saying, how you say it and even if it’s worth saying it at all. Continue reading “Slut Shamers: Back off.”

    Scared of being me?

    Hello you! This post is something that I hoped to right months ago, but I couldn’t. I’ve been struggling for a very long time. I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted to be. I put on weight, I was unhappy to my core and work made me cry daily. In today’s post I wanted to write a little reminder to both myself and others, that sometimes t takes one change to create a huge positive impact on your life. So, here goes…I’ve not felt myself in a very long time. In fact, if I’m being honest I couldn’t tell you the last time I laughed until my stomached or the last time I championed myself to do something I was scared to. Because I was just that, scared.

    Scared of failing?

    Scared to let the ones I love down. Scared to not be the person I wanted to be. Yet, to frightened to make the changes needed to become the person I hoped I was. Often I describe my past self as a shell of a person and I don’t think I ever really upgraded to anything more.

    The change.

    June, a month that kicked my arse into gear. Honestly, because of those changes I finally feel, a little more like me. Sure, I’ve not belly laughed or done anything drastic to improve anyone one else’s life. However, I’ve let myself be happy. Of course I’m still shit scared of failing, but after weeks in a new situation I’m much more confident. I may not be strutting around like Naomi Campbell, but I’m not flailing around like a turtle stuck on its back either. Finally piece by piece, step by step, prossecco by prossecco, I finally feel like I’m getting my shit together.

    What feeling like ‘me’ is ?

    Honesty, I have no clue. Other than the fact I don’t second guess myself anymore. Nor do I tell myself off after screwing up for the millionth time. I now champion the things I’ve done right and reward myself for them. Right now, I’m planning ahead. Booking in cocktails with the girls and just give myself a break. No one in this world is harsher in you than you are. Once you stop and give yourself a break the world seems a lot less grey.

    Hello, confidence? Are you there?

    By nature I’m not the most confident of folks. Without a bottle of prosecco in me I probably wouldn’t tell my fave bloggers, I love them. Or big up my bestie for all the emotional support she’s gave me when I didn’t know my arse from my elbow. I can say I am getting better. I know myself and I don’t plan on stopping, no matter what life throws my way. So Meg Says you could be on for many more ‘you’re bloody amazing’ messages, sorry not sorry!

    Exceptions to my rules.

    I suffer with anxiety and panic attacks, recently I’ve been able to control them. For some this isn’t the case, if you are feeling like the world is getting to much and you don’t have enough room to breathe, then organisations like mind can help. If you need any other help please get in touch and I will try to help as best as I can.

    What next?

    I don’t know. And I’m petrified to find out. All I’m hoping for is I finally find my laugh and there’s lashing of gin and prosecco along the way. Continue reading “Scared of being me?”

    New job,New blog & Body Image.

    Aye up, you fit bunch.June, where have you gone!It’s safe to say this little bloggers been on a bit of a mission recently. A mission to maybe get her sh*t together and do some of the things I say I will but never get around too. This month has seen me go self hosted, get a new job and kind of find an okay relationship with my body.By nature I hate summer, I’m much more of a winter baby. Yet summer 2018, is the season I finish my wine and get sh*t done. I and so so happy with the changes I’ve been making recently and I thought I would update you on a few of them.PST. Maybe get a brew, there’s a lot to catch up on.

    New job.

    Yesssss, ya girls got a new job! Now I don’t like talking about work on my blog. What I will say is that this job has given me an opportunity to get out of a position I hated. My last role left me quite lonely and my mental health started declining. So my new job was so welcome and I’m already feeling better about myself.

    New blog? Kinda.

    For the last year I’ve been debating going self hosted. Theres been a few reasons as to why I haven’t but the main one I felt like I wasn’t good enough. I’m not as eloquent as bloggers out there. I’m never going to look like Lydia Millen or be able to create a funny af yet oh so relatable post like Vix.

    The thing I forgot about is, I’m me. And as a blogger you are your USP. The slightly plump, 5’4 Yorkshire lass with a killer eye roll and day dreams for days, makes this blog what it is. Life’s to short for the ifs and buts, so I took the plunge.

    Body image

    Now I’ve been pretty open about not being completely comfortable in my own skin. To be truthful I am no where near as comfortable as I would like to be. Although, I have definitely been taking giant leaps in the right direction.

    As a rule I wouldn’t show of my tummy, all tops needed to be longer than my bum, arms needed to be covered. Which was fine until some one had the grand idea to create a Very British heat wave which left me over heating, sweating and just massively rank.So I decided I couldn’t be arsed. Everyone has a tummy, most people have issues with their bodies, so why was I stopping myself feeling cool ?And with that I have found my love for summer dressing.So this little update may be a slightly boring and massively rambling (clues in the name folks). I just wanted to update you guys on my life and the reason I’ve been a bit quiet on the blog front. Hope you’ve enjoyed this little blog about the changes I’ve been making recently.See ya Sunday.Always love,Em x