Hello, my loves.
I honestly don’t know where to start with this post. So I apologise right now, if it seems like a big old brain fart- it is. But here goes nothing.
I hate the way I look.
At this moment in time I struggle to look comfortably at myself in the mirror. As far as I can remember I have always had weight issues. Being a massive comfort eater, my weight has yo yo’d for as long as I could eat. I don’t think a week goes by without a comment on my weight or back handed compliments get flung my way. Cause everyone wants to hear ‘ you’d be pretty if you lost a bit of weight’. Lovely!
I have always been conscious about my weight, over the past few months I’ve wanted to grow as a person. The way I look kind off fell to the wayside a little bit. At this moment in time I am so unbelievably proud that I have faced the obstacle’s I have, head on. I’ve kind of accepted that I was a horrible teen and an even more hideous person as a student. And I have rectified most of it. Or at least I hope I have.
This post isn’t to create a pitty party. This post is for me. A post I have created to remind myself on a few things.
1, Fuck the people who belittle you. They are only insecure themselves.
Now, Em, you know who they are.
Family, friends or whoever else constantly makes you feel shit about your weight or the way you look shouldn’t be given the time of day. When they are close members of family this is more difficult but isn’t impossible to do. You are stronger than you think, and they’re words don’t define you.
2, Get back to the gym.
The GYM? Yes.
The gym is an amazing outlet. Use the bikes, cross trainers or whatever piece of equipment you want, until you can’t think of those words any more. No one ever looks forward to going to the gym, but you will feel better for it. So, fucking go.
3, Stop using the scales.
Weighing scales are the devil.
Those numbers don’t define you. Don’t look at them you’ll be happier for it.
4, Remember this.
I constantly doubt myself, my abilities and pretty much everything else that comes my way. This is something I have to remind myself daily. The way I look is not the reason my ex cheated? It’s not the reason why some people want to put you down. And it is most certainly not the reason why you hated being the person you were.
So just remember. You, my dear are enough. *Repeat until it sinks in*
I could go on and on about this subject. Whether you are under, over or slap bang in the middle, YOU ARE AMAZING. *shed’s tear into my brew*